Friday, December 12, 2008

Temptation

Loneliness… the feeling that made you want to be with someone to begin with. But now, after so long being with him/her, you feel even more alone. Alone because the one who is supposed to understand you, doesn’t, Solitude because what you like and what you want doesn’t seem to matter to him/her, and Cold because the heat and warmth that was once there has been replaced by anger and resentment. Alone and afraid to let go, hope feels like a song you haven’t heard in a long time, and when that tune plays in your mind, you wander to somewhere long ago. Long ago where once you might have been happy?

Then, out of nowhere, temptation comes along in the form of a fresh and juicy fruit. The temptation is perfect in every way, glistening and reflective, warm and happy to the touch. This is truly a heavenly bliss where nothing can go wrong… at least it would appear so to you. The apples in the supermarkets always look perfect and fresh because they are waxed on the outside to preserve its looks on the outside. However, you will find that after the first bite, and enough time passed, it will lose its luster and and its flesh will turn from a glistening white to a dullish brown. So… then what do you do? If each boat we jump is from one slow cooker to another, whats the point? The point is if you have gone thru this once, twice, too many times… then you are the problem. You are not happy with yourself and that is why you pretend to be someone you are not, someone to make him/her happy, someone to do what is necessary to be accepted… wanted. Then that someone you pretended to be becomes a prison to who you are, so you run away to the next temptation after another, but only to find you are merely breaking our of your cell, but not your prison. and your prison is you.

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