i learn to understand myself

I woke up at such an unearthly hour, not understanding why I woke up so. But I guess there is too much in my life for me to be sleeping in any peace at all. But nevertheless, an offer to have a personal blog came in now. then i realized it feels good to really have a blog so i can write everything that running wild on my mind.

For today I remind myself to stop showing off what I have. I hate shown offs. But helplessly I tell people what I have done, bought and achieve. Why don’t I keep my mouth shut about somethings which just bore people, because it can only arouse me but no one else.

But I can’t help it, and I reflect upon my own actions daily. Then it struck me…Its because I have what I have today mainly as I stand on my own feet and rely on no one else. I have it despite being burden with my responsibilities in my life. But I am glad I have not stepped on anyone’s toes yet with my irritating self told stories. I hate myself when I do it, but it gives me closure to tell people that something good has happen to me in my wretched life. Please forgive me for giving myself this little relief. It keeps me sane from time to time.